Unacknowledged Truths of the Akatsuki
by Dajypop
Summary: A collection of drabbles about the Akatsuki with different pairings I like. :3 Rating to be safe. KisaIta, KakuHida, Tobidei, ZetsuSaso, PeiKo. Fluff, yaoi.
1. KakuHida: No Gel Required

**AN: Alright, guys....this is inspired by the Unofficial Rules of Being a Turk. XD I decided it would be entertaining, and so it was written. :3**

Pairings: KakuHida, ZetsuSasori, TobiDei, KisaIta

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**Unofficial Rules to Being in Akatsuki: No Gel Required**/u

Quite a few members of the Akatsuki knew that gel was never something that Kakuzu would allow in the budget. He would never permit Hidan to have something just for his hair, because it wasn't a life or death situation or any of that. So, then, there was an obvious problem and cause for curiosity; how did Hidan get his hair to stay smoothed back like that? He wasn't caught touching it very often.

One day, it finally got the best of Deidara, who went to his ex boyfriend's new lover for help.

"Zetsu...I want you to do me a favor, un." The blond bomber told the dual-skinned male.

"Sure, what is it?" The happier, higher pitched sound of the white half perking up and sounding happy.

"Shut it, idiot. What is it you want, Deidara?" The darker voice questioned, eye narrowing.

"Well...Kakuzu doesn't let Hidan get gel, right?"

"Right." Both halves spoke at once.

"I want to know how his hair stays back like that. For that, we need someone who is good at hiding." Zetsu seemed to mull that over in his head before giving a slow nod. Truth be told, he was kind of curious, himself.

"Alright, we will do it." He nodded slowly, heading off to wait for the zombie twins to wake up.

- * - * - * -

Kakuzu had been awake for quite some time, counting his money at the foot of the bed. His green eyes trailed each bill carefully, making sure to wash over it for serial numbers and make sure he didn't get any of his counterfeit bills mixed in with his real money. Each number seemed catalogued in his head, and he made sure to seperate his money into piles by the general value before going back and starting with the ones, moving on to the fives and so on and so forth. Each bundle was given a rubber band and a slip of paper depicting how much was in it, and there were never more than a fifty slips of paper per stack.

It was when Hidan awoke that the flytrap in the wall became interested, watching the pair. His hair was down and hanging around his face like he hadn't done anything to it, and he hadn't.

"Kuzu...it's too fuckin' early for money-counting. Come back here and lay with me." Said albino whined, wriggling a little, seeming upset already. His voice could grate one's nerves better than a cheese grater; even Zetsu felt a twitch come to his eye.

"It's never too early for money, Hidan." Came the simple reply, ignoring the nickname, for now, and the obnoxious noise of the other's simpering.

"Just come lay the fuck down with me! I want to fuckin' play, Jashin damn it, and I will play until I am happy and content with it." Came the order, making a growl leave the banker. He carefully sat his wad down on a trunk at the base of the bed and turned angry eyes on Hidan, narrowing them. He lacked a shirt and his mask and headgear, and, while Zetsu found it odd to see all those stitches and the masks in the other's back, he had likely seen weirder.

Kakuzu began to crawl forward on the bed, making his ascent slow and torturous up the other's legs and body to stop just a few inches from touching the masochist beneath him. In one quick movement, a hand gripped Hidan's hair hard and the other moved to the whiny man's neck, and while his air supply was threatened, as well as sharp threads greedily slicing slowly into his neck, Hidan let loose a nice, low moan. Even as it severed the man's vocal cords, he seemed still able to talk, purring and groaning his pleasure.

That hand tightened considerably harder, yanking a good deal of it back and holding Hidan's pale, slender neck out so that he could get to it easier. The Jashinist began to wriggle and writhe as two more sharp threads began to cut around his nipples, sensitizing the skin there before slashing straight through each nipple, forcing the albino to cry out loudly.

Zetsu sat through the entire set of foreplay, and even the sex, with Hidan on all fours and his neck still bared by the hand in his hair. Once it was all finished, Hidan collapsed and licked his lips, panting slightly before shivering a little more. He sat up, slowly, after Kakuzu had pulled back and realigned his pants on his hips. His hair was perfect, as per usual, and didn't seem to want to move.

"Deidara is going to have a hay-day with this." Zetsu muttered to himself as he removed himself from the room.

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AN: Alright, guys. I liked how this came out. :3 I may write quite a few more of these today. :3 Look out for them.


	2. KakuHida: Kakuzu's Greed

**AN: Hey, again. Thought I could add another addition to this story while I had some energy. There may be a few new ones tomorrow, too. :3 Maybe two or three, depending on how long they are. Be expecting quite a few of these. Changed the title, too. Alright, so, here we go.**

Pairings: KakuHida, mentioned KisaIta, ZetsuSasori, TobiDei

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**Unacknowledged Truths Of The Akatsuki: Kakuzu's Greed**

When Hidan had first joined the Akatsuki, he didn't think it could get any worse. He was trapped with this greedy heathen for a partner, nobody took his religion seriously, and everyone was so full of themselves that he could hardly get a non-bitchy word in edgewise. Nobody had any care about what he said or thought, either, they just wanted him to shut up, mostly.

He didn't start to really think about this being a good thing until he had begun to get more in touch with his partner. While they didn't ever and probably never would see eye-to-eye, they had something of an understanding. Kakuzu had given up thinking that Hidan was able to be mapped out and that he'd ever be able to know what the Jashinist was doing before he could. And Hidan had, grudgingly, come to the realization that Kakuzu wanted nothing to do with Jashin, but the albino's body was something that he _did_ have some interest in.

However, Kakuzu's greed never seemed sated. Often times, even if he wanted sex with Hidan, he would force his partner to pay unheard of amounts of Ryo in order to get some. And when they did go at it, nobody would see Hidan for a few days after that. He either had been incapacitated or was just unable to walk. While the albino loved every second of the rough treatment, the after affects could be quite annoying. The inability to walk correctly, the need of another set of stitches to hold him together again...sometimes he wondered if he and Kakuzu could go about it gentler, and if that would be anywhere near as enjoyable.

When they had tried it, neither male seemed very entertained. Hidan complained with hardly a stutter to his voice the entire time, and his partner's hips had a hard time staying calm and soft; he wanted to pound the Hell out of his priest until neither of them had any energy to be alive anymore. They'd pass out together and wake up the next day in each other's arms.

When they did it like that, though, Hidan was left food and waterless for as many days as he needed to regain his ability to walk. And that, that was annoying. Behind closed doors, Kakuzu would admit that he secretly loved the priest, but when it came to public admittance...well, that never seemed to work at all. It was almost like Kakuzu was ashamed of him. He always felt, somewhere deep in his head, that that was the problem at hand.

Until the day that he had been caught in the midst of loving Hidan like only he could, by Deidara, who had managed to explode a small peep hole into their wall a few days previous that neither male knew about. It had completely changed the way Kakuzu had acted around the others. He became colder and more harsh and threatening to anyone that wasn't Hidan, who he lavished all of his misguided affection on.

As the albino reflected upon this, he sighed. He had waited for weeks, months...for what seemed like _years_ for Kakuzu to change. He had begun to think that he was just being stupid, pinning his hopes on the change in his partner. That wouldn't happen, not ever. And then that incident happened and, for once, Kakuzu made him feel important, like he wasn't the lowest life form on the planet. He was held with high regard, suddenly, like he had been a prince in hiding and suddenly was able to tell his lover about it, and that changed completely the way he acted. It was...nice.

That change had only happened two weeks ago. They had only been together for real for _two weeks_, and then this happened. First of all, for the first time in his life, he felt a tether to someone other than Jashin. When he had accidentally stabbed Kakuzu in the heart...that had made his own sink. But his own arrogance had kept him acting normal, like nothing was wrong. He was a little surprised it hadn't been Shikamaru, but that was nothing to fret about.

But...then he knew that Kakuzu was dead. The removal of his own head didn't quite shock him as much; with the aforementioned angry banker as his partner and lover, he lost his head a lot and it was a rather useful, if not unneeded, threat. It was a surprise to be put into the hole and have everything crash over him. It was dark, painful, full of bugs and dead animals...and, the worst part of it all...was that he had to sit there and do nothing but bitch to the walls of his confines and think.

Thinking had never been a good or favorite past-time for the Jashinist; it was bad, to be honest. He hated to just sit there and think. Not because it was boring, like he usually claimed, not because Kakuzu made him do it too much, not because of any reason he had ever spouted off to his lover or anyone else, for that matter. It was because his thoughts often traveled to things that made his heart hurt.

Even separated from it, Hidan knew that he wanted Kakuzu to dig through the rubble and save him, sew his head back on and they could run off back to base. He felt, by now, that he'd been hoping for months, again. He hoped he would forget about his deceased partner...but it didn't get much dumber than that. Trying to forget someone when you loved them...maybe that was why he had never wanted to try it before.

It wasn't for any reason other than that. And, of course, Kakuzu had been the greediest Jashin-damned bastard to ever walk the face of the planet. He had taken everything with him; his money, his body...and even Hidan's heart. That had been the one that, repeatedly after they had finally gotten together, Kuzu had promised not to reap, but here Hidan found himself, pining and wishing for him to return.

"Jashin fucking damn it, Kuzu! Get me out of this fucking hole right damned now or I swear to Jashin I will fucking kill your dead body with all the fucking power I have in my abso-fuckin'-lutely pissed off body!" Hidan screamed at the top of his lungs, delusional to think that, within minutes, he would hear a grumble and feel the rocks shift, Kakuzu telling him to keep his fucking mouth shut. When that didn't come, he shifted his head a bit and closed his eyes, picturing his lover living somewhere else. He had never converted, so even if Hidan died in this stupid hole, he knew that he'd never see him again.

"Hidan, you idiot, are you coming yet?" Came a gruff voice and the Jashinist blinked, then shifted again and searched for a way out.

"Kuzu?! Where the fuck are you?!"

"Up here." A hand, transparent, reached through the rock. "Jashin says it's time to worship him to his face." Was that a hint of a smile in his voice? Hidan moved to reach and found that, somehow, it worked and he took his lover's hand for the first time in two months. They began to rise from the hole and there he was; Kakuzu floated up with him, tugging his lover into his arms and hugging him tight. He didn't look different at all, save for the feathery, blood-red wings protruding from his back. Hidan felt a sudden jolt of pain and his own back split open at the shoulder blades, causing him to scream in pain as Kakuzu raked his hands over his lover's back and stomach to ease it a bit.

"Shut the fuck up, Hidan." Came the mumbled reply, "I thought you liked pain?"

"Sh-uuahhh!-uuuuuut uppppppppp~." Came the purred reply, eyelids fluttering a bit as he curled his toes and panted in his lover's arms.

"Hidan..." A new voice spoke and he turned, staring at the most amazing being he had ever seen. Jashin was just as magnificent and all-powerful as he had always thought, and his short speech almost left the Jashinist in total happy tears. He had done the correct amount, and more, of sacrifices, he had done good by his lifestyle and had never strayed. He was given his haven, and Kakuzu was allowed to share it with him.

However, once they were safe and tucked away in a soft bed with satin covers, the walls lined with whips, chains, and all sorts of fun-looking items...Hidan smacked Kakuzu just as hard as he could in the shoulder.

"Bastard."

"What was that for?" Came the rumbled, sinister chuckle.

"You're a greedy damn bastard!" Hidan snapped.

"Why?"

"You promised you'd never take my heart, but when you died, you did."

"I didn't touch your damn heart."

"You did...it hurt, and it wasn't even attached to my body."

"You're so sentimental, Hidan." The albino rose from his spot and headed to the wall, picking up a choke chain with spikes on the inside. He hooked it to his neck and grabbed another chain and tightly wrapped it about his right upper thigh. Gorgeous red slipped down his thighs, and he smirked, attaching a braided leather leash to his collar before licking his lips and returning to the bed.

"You're a greedy bastard. Now, fucking play with me. It's been too damn long and I plan on making the best of eternity."

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AN: There we go...thought it would be interesting to write something like that. That's another KakuHida down. :3


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